Score: 8

"haikus never go out of style"

submission: Haikus II

date: November 26, 2003

i was thoroughly impressed. by your reviews as much as your movie.

everything just sounds better in haiku format.

Score: 3

"and this is the most popular movie ever..."

submission: Kerri's Big Invention

date: November 23, 2003

times i laughed = 0
times i smirked = 0
times i thought 'this cartoon has practically no redeeming qualities whatsoever' = 310

i do not understand how this movie is ranked #1. the jokes are weak and poorly executed. the animation is average. the drawings are average. it's actually a very dull cartoon.
i'm confused.
-alan

Score: 2

"just what the world needs..."

submission: Day of Revenge

date: October 12, 2003

wow, someone goes on a killing rampage... not only it is completely unoriginal, it is also completely disgusting and quite boring.

i do not understand this obsession with violence. there are other ways to entertain/convey messages, etc.

Score: 8

"keanu reeves or knox? indistinguishable!"

submission: Knoxs "The Matrix"

date: October 3, 2003

i only wish i could've watched the making of this. i bet it was just as funny as the actual movie. i'm sure there were lots of great lines that didn't make it or didn't fit, etc. anyways, the second half was definitely stronger. i was quite impressed.
few understand the art of the voice dub, the loneliness of talking to a screen, the sore throats... so you have my respect and admiration.

Score: 2

"poor carl orff"

submission: o fortuna

date: October 1, 2003

it's always sad to see such beautiful music abused in this way, propelling mindless violence.

Score: 6

"tell dane my roommate damian (from LA) says 'hi'"

submission: Hell On Earth- Episode 1

date: September 12, 2003

the animation was amazing, the concept was great, it had tons of style, but the script(in my opinion) seemed underdeveloped and the dialog just did not flow too well. it was a little hard to watch.

Score: 7

"a little car chased by a little man..."

submission: Banjo Masacre

date: August 30, 2003

i laughed. the ending is worth the build up, though, so be strong! don't quit! stick it out!

yes...i laughed.

Score: 9

"brilliant!"

submission: Bobby's House 2

date: March 1, 2002

geez, i love all your stuff. i'm beginning to wonder if it's possible for you to submit a bad movie.

Score: 9

"The best cat-o-blue ever"

submission: Cat-O-Blue on the farm

date: March 1, 2002

we can only guess what happened this time! har har har. that silly cat-o-blue

Score: 8

"you people are nuts!"

submission: Garth & Cliffe's Hotel 3

date: February 27, 2002

the garth and cliff hotel series is one of my favorites. for those of you who don't see the humor in this... well, i pity you and your poor parents who must be so ashamed of you. you're lucky you weren't given up for adoption. and for those of you who are adopted...well, now you know why.